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The content of these pages brings together external sources, whether they are written pieces, online publications, suggestions from our visitors or local folklore. Of course, it is not intended to be offensive for anyone and it should be treated accordingly.
Moreover, we are looking forward to receiving suggestions and new jokes from our readers or anyone else willing to actively participate in the content development process.
A man walks into a bar, he is an alcoholic and is ruining his family.
The Wisconsin State Dept of Fish and Wildlife is advising hikers, hunters, fishermen and golfers to take extra precautions and be on the alert for bears this summer.
They advise people to wear noise-producing devices such as little bells on their clothing to alert but not startle the bears unexpectedly.
They also advise you to carry pepper spray in case of an encounter with a bear.
People should be able to recognize the presence of bears in an area by their droppings:
Black bear droppings are smaller and contain berry residue and possibly squirrel fur.
Grizzly bear droppings have little bells in them and smell like pepper spray.
Q: What do you get when you cross a chicken and a vacuum?
A: A cocksucker.
The day you introduce your mom to Chuck Norris, is the day you mom introduces you to your biological father.
Yo momma is so so fat that when she sat on a monster truck she made it a low-rider.
My sister asked me to take off her clothes. So I took off her shirt. Then she said, “Take off my skirt.” So I took off her skirt. “Take off my shoes.” I took off her shoes. “Now take off my bra and panties.” So I took them off. Then she looked at me and said, “I don’t want to catch you wearing my things ever again.”
How did the pig get to the hospital?
In a hambulance.
Q: What has eight arms and an IQ of 60?
A: Four guys drinking Bud Light and watching a football game!
Q: What do you call a vicar with a boner?
A: An erector.
If I hit a baseball and it rolled under the fence and was eaten by a pig, what would it be called as?
An inside the pork home-run.
Life is good when I can afford to buy recycled toilet paper.
Yo Mamma so fat she had to have a real horse on her polo shirt.
Q: What is a blonde doing when she holds her hands tightly over her ears?
A: Trying to hold on to a thought.
Yo mamma is so ugly when she took a bath the water jumped out.
Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the jaw, it's decendents are known today as giraffes.
A man is standing at a grave, staring at the head stone. A second man walks up and asks, "Is this someone you knew?" The first guy says, "Yes, it was my wife." The second guy says, "It must be hard to lose a wife." The first guys replies, "Yep, damn near impossible."
Q: What do lesbians cook on the weekends? A: Nothing; they eat out.
Yo mama is so stupid when the judge said, Order! Order!" she said, "Fries and coke please."
When chuck norris asks for change for a penny, he always gets it.
Q: Why did the duck go to jail?
A: Because he got caught selling quack.
Yo mama is so stupid she murked herself in a rap battle!
Q: What type of exam does the vampire teacher give his students?
A: A blood test.
Chuck Norris likes his coffee half and half: half coffee grounds, half wood-grain alcohol.
Definitions from The College Dictionary
Cafeteria: From 2 Latin words, "cafe" meaning place to eat and "teria" meaning to wretch.
Major: Area of study that no longer interest you.
Student Athlete: See "contraction in terms."
Grade: Unrealistic and limited measure of academic accomplishment.
Summer School: A viable alternative to a summer job.
Quarter: The most coveted form of currency on campus.
Hunger: Condition produced by five minutes of continuous studying.
Why are women’s breasts like a train set a kid gets at Christmastime? Because they were originally made for children but fathers want to play with them.
Two storks on a nest, a father stork and baby stork. Baby is crying and crying and father stork is trying to calm him. "Don't worry Son, your mother will come back. She's only bringing people babies and making them happy."
The next night, its fathers turn to do the job.
"Son, your father will be back as soon as possible, but now he's bringing joy to new mommies and daddies."
A few days later, the stork parents are desperate, their son is gone from the nest all night. Finally, shortly before dawn, he returns and the parents ask their son where he had been all night. Says the baby stork, "Awww, just scaring the hell out of college kids!"
Q: What do you call a vegan with diarrhea?
A: A salad shooter.
Q: What do you call a cow that just gave birth?
182,000 Americans die from Chuck Norris-related accidents every year.
As I rowed my little boat
Toward the river shore,
A small black bird kept me from landing,
Quoth the raven, "never moor."
What did the girl say when the Statue of Liberty sneezed?
God bless America.
My girlfriend wanted us to get a Sleep Number bed, so we went and checked it out. Turns out her sleep number is 61, and mine is $3500!
Two men broke into a drugstore and stole all the Viagra. The police put out an alert to be on the lookout for the two hardened criminals.
Most tough men eat nails for breakfast. chuck Norris does all of his grocery shopping at Home Depot.
Q: How do you start a rave in Africa? A: Staple toast to the ceiling.
Chuck Norris plays racquetball with a waffle iron and a bowling ball.
Q: What the difference between your first and second honeymoon?
A: Niagara and Viagra.
Two women that are dog owners are arguing about which dog is smarter....
First Woman : "My dog is so smart, every morning he waits for the paper boy to come around and then he takes the newspaper and brings it to me.
Second Woman : "I know..."
First Woman : "How?"
Second Woman : "My dog told me."
A blind man walks into a department store with a seeing-eye dog. He begins swinging the dog wildly above his head when a clerk asks "What are you doing?!". The blind man replies "Oh, just looking around."
Chuck Norris is a vegetarian. Meaning, he does not eat animals until first he puts them into vegetative state with his fists.